SarahIn Pursuit of Thankfulness & Adaptation –
Time is a funny thing. This time last month I was still home, likely watching TV with family, yet a part of me can’t imagine it was so recent… even as present-day me relaxes in my little flat and watches TV alone, long after the local trains have stopped (a hearty 9pm, as it turns out).
Sometimes I would love to freeze moments for later appreciation. I recently climbed Belfort’s fort and was startled by the 360 degree beauty of the view. After capturing photos, there’s not much more one can do to remember it besides staring and trying to commit the feeling of wonder to memory. I fear that one can get immune to nearby beauty… On some consumeristic level, the quest for novel wonder keeps me travelling. I was recently surprised at how lovely a couple of sunset photos turned out (see banner). My general surroundings were beautiful at the time, and I felt so happy after meeting a bunch of other assistants, that honestly I hadn’t remembered how vivid it was. My gosh, that sounds cheesy.
These are the moments we freeze, frame, and commemorate to social media.
Other moments are less glamorous. Administrative drama. Realizing you don’t know many people nearby. Uncertainties about visas, social practices, French jargon, phone plans, or anything that shouldn’t feel like a big deal but somehow does.
I suppose this is a pep talk to anyone in a similar situation. No one can tell you how you “shouldn’t feel”. By all means, pursue healthy practices, including saying “yes”, getting out of your comfort zone to meet people, and taking care of yourself in general. However, there is no shame in an off-day or two or three. Moving is hard. Honestly, I often feel a little blue a couple weeks into the school term, as routines and friendships solidify… eventually, it passes, and you hardly remember the initial shadow. Memory can be encouraging like that. This also reminds me of arriving in Germany, except now with better language skills and less community (you win some, you lose some, right?).
It was recently Canadian Thanksgiving, probably the first one that I’ve had far from my parents. Later that week, when all everyone’s family FB photos were going up and my plans had been cancelled, I found myself feeling melancholic. However, I eventually got myself outside, had a really lovely conversation with a restaurant owner who was curious about Canada, found a couple events to join, and stocked up my fridge. It didn’t radically shift anything, but it reminded me that I’m happy to build a life here and that the local, day-to-day relationships will come. Perhaps that resonates with you as well.
Some of my favourite things here so far (no particular order):
- Getting to know welcoming people (profs, assistants and community)
- Exploring new cities
- Youth recognizing me and greeting me in English
- When people think I have decent French (and having chances to improve it)
- Feeling less and less lost in my local community
- Finally having a bank account and phone number
- Keeping in touch w/people back home & other assistants
- Anticipation (I confess, both for starting teaching and for the almost immediate vacation)
After this week, I’ll be done “observation period” and it’s time for full assistantship. First couple topics: ask-the-Canadian, job interviews, and bullying. More to come.
To friends & family back home and those also finding their way in France… Bisous!
-Sarah xo
